A predestined pathway
by ethereal123
Summary: Severus Snape has always known he was meant to be in Slytherin, and that Lily Evans was far too good to be with him. Nevertheless, there is a fine line between knowing where you belong and accepting it. - Story set in Marauders time and from Snape's POV.
1. Chapter 1 - The very beginning

**Chapter 1 – The very beginning**

The sun was beaming in the clear sky, laying its rays on the big red train on which the words _Hogwarts Express_ were shining brightly. All around, students were saying their goodbyes to their parents and boarding the train, accompanied by their friends or siblings or both. In one corner stood a small, lanky boy, his hands tucked inside his pockets.

Severus Snape could not suppress his envy at the sight of all these loving families, whereas his own father did not even bother accompanying him on this very important day.

"You got everything, Severus?" asked his mother, who had reluctantly come along, mostly out of obligation. She fought again with her husband this morning, and could not for a second grasp the importance of this day for her only child.

Snape knew very well what was going on in her mother's head at this moment, but waved it away. He would not let anything spoil this moment for him. He was finally going to Hogwarts, the day has come, and he could not hold in his excitement. Away from home, away from his drunk dad, from his resentful mother, from that hole they call a house. It was finally time to start over, start fresh. He politely said his goodbyes, let his mother hug him, rather coldly, and head his way toward the train.

From the corner of his eye, he could see Lily Evans having a spat with her muggle sister. _Jealous bitch,_ thought Snape, but he could not say it in front of Lily. She would call him mean and insensitive. Instead, he watched as she ran towards the train, looking angrier than ever, and followed her from afar.

It took a few tries before he found the compartment in which she was hunched in a corner, her face pressed against the windowpane, and completely ignoring the group of boys who were talking. Snape slid open the door and sat down opposite Lily. She glanced at him and then looked back out of the window.

"I don't want to talk to you" she said. Snape's vision was mesmerized. How could he have forgotten just how beautiful she looked, with her long silky hair and big bright eyes. As she had just recently cried, her emerald eyes shined even brighter, making her more beautiful than ever.

"Why not?" He asked, as he did not comprehend why she was mad at him.

"Turney h-hates me. Because we saw that letter from Dumbledore." Snape understood at last. That jealous muggle sister again.

"So what?" He asked again.

"So she's my sister!" She responded angrily, confusing him even more, as he did not comprehend the natural bond between two siblings, the unconditional love he has never witnessed between family members.

"She's only a—" He caught himself quickly. There was no point, it would only anger her. For some reason, Lily loved her sister, even though the girl was always hateful and mean. Snape make an awkward movement, as he ached to take her in his arms for comfort but, at the same moment, he noticed the other boys in the compartment and decided against it. He moved the subject onto the one thing that united them.

"But we're going! This is it. We're off to Hogwarts!" Lily nodded, mopping her eyes, but in spite of herself, she half smiled.

"You'd better be in Slytherin" He added.

"Slytherin?" Said one of the boys in the compartment that had shown no interest to Snape or Lily hitherto. He had black, scruffy hair, tiny glasses, and a smug look of disgust.

"Who wants to be in Slytherin?" Continued the boy. "I think I'd leave, wouldn't you?" He asked the boy sitting opposite him. Snape recognised him right away. The youngest of the Blacks. Pure bloods, muggle haters, and big supporters of He-who-must-not-be-named. The young Black did not smile at the question.

"My whole family have been in Slytherin" He said, confirming Snape's guess on his identity.

"Blimey" Answered the glass-wearing smug boy, "and I thought you seemed all right!"

"Maybe I'll break the tradition" Grinned the young Black. "Where are you heading, if you've got the choice?"

The smug boy ridiculously lifted an invisible sword.

"Gryffindor, where dwell the brave at heart! Like my dad." Snape couldn't supress a snort.

"Got a problem with that?" Smug boy asked.

"No" Responded Snape, and he knew at this very second that he would never like this little daddy's boy who was looking at him with an air of superiority. "If you'd rather be brawny than brainy-" he added.

"Where're you hoping to go, seeing as you're neither?" Cut in the young Black.

Both boys roared in laughter. Lily sat up, rather flushed, and looked from both boys in dislike.

"Come on, Severus, let's find another compartment" She said, pulling Snape by the hand.

"Oooooooo…." Mocked the boys, imitating Lily's voice.

As the exited the wagon and walked on, Snape heard the boys mock his name as Lily slid angrily the door _"See ya, Snivellus"_ but he could only think of Lily's hand holding his, and pulling him close to her as she directed them.

The rest of the ride went by eventless. Snape explained the different virtues of the houses, making a big emphasis on Slytherin's, hoping to entice her.

"It does not really matter which house we end up in" Lily concluded, "Of course, If I could choose, I would much rather be with you than these two arrogant and mean boys, but I mean, either way, It won't stop us from being friends or becoming great wizards" Snape smiled, profondely touched by his friend's kind words.

"No, it won't."

* * *

Snape stood awkwardly in his row, waiting, as the sorting hat was being laid on Lily Evans pretty little head. His heart sunk as the words – GRYFFINDOR – roared in the castle, and he watched as Lily got up and started to walk toward her new table. Before she sat down, she cast him a meaningful look, and he forced himself to smile back.

" _Potter, James" cried Professor McGonagall,_ and Snape recognised daddy's boy as he walked his way toward the hat. It barely braised his head and cried GRYFFINDOR.

Snape sighed as the black-haired boy joined Lily's table and sat next to the youngest of the Black family who, to everyone's surprise, has also been sent to Gryffindor. It then occurred to Snape that perhaps the rumors were true, and it was possible to _pick_ a house. How else had Black ended with the Gryffindors?

"Snape, Severus" cried McGonagall. Snape jolted and walking his way toward the stool, his hands shaking. As he sat down, his eyes met Lily's one last time before he closed his eyes and concentrated as he felt the sorting hat being put on his head.

"SLYTHERIN" Screamed the hat after a long pause. A roar of scream immerged from the silver and green table towards which Snape was now directing himself, his face blank. All across the hall, Lily Evans was scrutinizing her friend, wondering why his sorting took so much longer than the others, and why he seemed so unhappy, whereas he always expressed a great envy to end up at Slytherin.


	2. Chapter 2 - Life as a Slytherin

**Chapter 2 – Life as a Slytherin**

* * *

Snape walked his way toward the Slytherin table, his head full of the sorting hat's mystical warnings, and absentmindedly sat down. He felt a pat on his black and turned around.

"Welcome to the best house" Said a tall blonde boy who had a shiny little badge on his robes. "I am Lucius Malfoy." Snape smiled back and looked around. He was not paying much attention to the sorting anymore, and was simply clapped along as _Wikes_ was being sorted to Slytherin as well. It seemed to be closing the ceremony and, as the young boy sat down next to him, the whole hall fell silent and Dumbledore got up.

"I can't believe that little turd" Spat a woman sitting across Snape. She had long, curly black hair, pulpy lips and big brown eyes, which were fixating on someone across the hall. Snape could not tell exactly what it was about her, for her beauty was almost equal to Lily's, however, it had something airy, and he suddenly felt sympathy for whoever it was she was shooting her cold glances at.

"How dare he soil our name like that!" She added, and both Lucius Malfoy and the blonde to her left seem to have understood who she was referring to, for they both turned to look in the same direction.

"It's him we should feel sorry for, Bella" Responded the blonde girl. "It's not like he decided this. He must be feeling miserable right now."

"Oh wake up Cissy" Retorted the first, "The sorting hat _always_ gives a choice in the end." Snape looked away.

"Hey" whispered a young boy to his left that had just been sorted with him. Snape remembered that his name was Mulciber.

"Isn't he the Wizard the Dark Lord wishes to destroy?" He pointed to Dumbledore.

"He is the wizard the Dark Lord _will_ destroy" Corrected Lucius, who heard them. "Now don't be fooled, we are here to win and destroy all competition." As he said these words, Dumbledore seemed to have finished his speech, as the whole hall began clapping and food began to appear.

Snape could not believe his eyes at the sight of that much delicacies, and made his best not to give away his years of under-nourishment by gulping everything he could grasp.

As the feast was over, Lucius got up and directed the first years towards their common room. Snape, along with the other first years, got up and began to follow, until he felt someone pull him back. Surprised, he turned around and recognized Lily.

"Hey" She said. Snape looked at her intensely, wondering what the oldest Gryffindors have told her about Slytherin, wondering how much of it she believed, and, more importantly, wondering if their friendship would survive these rumors.

"How dare you leave me with these two idiots" She added. "That James boy kept talking about his skills on a broom the whole time and, for some reason, the other kids were at awe." Snape chuckled.

"I missed you at my table too" He responded, although he knew she did not belong. Then, with a little caught, he managed to ask, the most casually he could, although his insides burned to know the answer.

"…So. What did they say about the house rivalries?" He saw it. It was there for a split second in her emerald eyes. She knew.

"Just smack talk" She responded, waving her hand. "Looks like we're going to be in competition for the house cup."

"True" Said Snape. "Although, I wish you the best of lucks with these two idiots."

"Snape, come on" Yelled Bellatrix, as she was closing the line of first years, her badge of prefect shining brightly on her robes.

"I must follow the first years or I won't know where to go." Snape told Lily. "Meet me in the hall tomorrow at 8, we could compare our schedules."

"Okay Sev, see you then" Lily squeezed his arm and turned around to meet up with the Gryffindors. Snape watched her go and wondering if, perhaps, he has made the wrong choice with the sorting hat.

"Who was this girl you were speaking to?" Asked Bellatrix as they were closing the march and heading towards the common room.

"She's my neighbor at home. Her parents live close to mine." He answered. The girl frowned.

"What's her last name again?"

"Evans. Lily Evans." He said.

"It doesn't ring a bell. She must be muggle born." Snape frowned. Was she saying that she knew every single wizard in the country? Was she that full of herself?

"Maybe" Responded Snape, who did not want to confirm that fact, as he noticed the disdain in his companion's voice.

"Anyway, my young boy, I am going to give you a few advices." She put her hand on his shoulder and turned him around, and kneeled to his level, her eyes fixed on him.

"First" She said, gesturing the number with her fingers, "Do not hang with Gryffindors. They're all idiots and Dumbledore supporters, and the Dark Lord will not take it kindly." Before Snape could speak, she added:

"Second, do not _ever_ interrupt or contradict me." He nodded, knowing he did not want to cross her.

"And at last, do not befriend Muggle-borns. It's for your own good really, soon they will all be dead." She got up, shuffled Snape's hairs with her hand and pushed him in the back to make him walk faster.

* * *

"Good morning" Snape looked up and, as he recognised Lily, quickly put down his spellbook.

"Good morning" He smiled back and quickly noticed she was the only person he actually enjoyed speaking to. She put down her schedule, and they compared them.

"Defense against the dark arts, Charms and Transfiguration together, look" She said happily. Snape kept looking.

"Looks like the broom flying lesson is all the houses together" He added.

"Great, so we will see each other this afternoon." He nodded, and watched her join two girls who were waiting for her down the hall. Was it his imagination, or were they unwilling to approach the Slytherin table? He shrugged his thoughts away and returned to his potions spellbook.

"Morning" Said Avery, who sat across him with Wikes and Rosier. Snape barely looked at them. They all got acquainted last night, as they share the same dormitories.

"Morning" He responded politely.

"Have you seen our schedule?" Asked Mulciber, who was sitting next to Snape and grabbed his schedule that was still laying there. " _Defense against the dark arts._ Who wants to hear about defense against the dark arts? I want to learn about how to _use_ the dark arts. You reckon there will be any classes on that in later years?"

"Not if Dumbledore stays the headmaster" Responded Avery. "Dad says he's all against the dark arts."

"Well I heard there are other ways" Interjected Wikes. "One of the oldest boys told me about a group called the Disciples of the Lord who meet and practice the dark arts. You know, to be ready to enroll. Apparently, some of the members have direct contact with Death Eater, and recruit within. They call it DTL thought, to avoid attracting attention."

"That's great, how do we join?"

"They only accept fourth years and above…"

"That's absurd!"

"I know"

"Maybe we could change their minds?"

"Or perhaps there are exceptions if you're well connected?"

Snape had lost interest and got up. Like any of these snort-nose children could teach him anything regarding the dark arts. He had been studying them since he learned how to read. Of course, back then, he did not know that there was any other kind of magic, and only grabbed the books he could find in his mother's poorly hidden library, too excited to learn, to leave his previous world behind.

He was the first to arrive to class and sat down in a corner, neatly placing his ingredients, spellbook and quills on the table. He barely glanced at the teacher, which he knew was the head of his house. Another Slytherin. Perhaps another worshipper of the Dark lord.

As the class begun, the professor introduced himself as _Professor Slughorn,_ and went on about the importance of being meticulous in potion making. The students were to take notes and, in the last hour, they got to test their skills into making a cough remedy.

"You may proceed in teams of two" Slughorn said with such excitement, as if handing them a wonderful surprise. Snape shrugged and went on, barely acknowledging the boys around his table. The four other Slytherins around him paired up amongst themselves, and the Hufflepuffs on the other side did not seem too eager to approach him, and paired up amongst themselves as well.

Slughorn walked around the tables, looking at everybody's work, and, to Snape's relief, did not comment on the fact that he was doing the work alone.

"My my my" He did however say, looking at his cauldron. "My dear boy, you have an unspeakable talent! What is your name?"

"Severus Snape" He answered rather shyly, as he did not enjoy the attention.

"Snape" Slughorn repeated. "Remarkable work. Come see me after class, will you?" He winked at him and kept walking around until the end of class.

Snape emptied his cauldron and tidied up as the other students left the class.

* * *

"The Slug-Club?" Repeated Lily. They were all in line outside, waiting for Professor Hooch, and Snape had explained his first Potions class to Lily, as she had finished explaining how Herbology went.

"He says only the elite are invited" Snape repeated, rolling his eyes. Lily could tell, by her friend's tone, that he did not care the slightest about this invitation.

"When is it?" She asked. "Maybe I'll get an invitation too?" Snape was about to interject, as she was Muggle-born, and Slughorn was the head of Slytherin, but decided against it.

"Hope you do" He said instead. "Then I might go."

"Alright, boys and girls" Interrupted Madame Hooch who had just arrived. "Raise your hand those of you who have flew on a broom before." A few students raised their hands, among which, Snape recognised James and Sirius. Hooch looked around and counted. She then began explaining how to lift the boom and get in the hair.

On the first try, she only made the students who had flew before get up, to demonstrate to the others.

"Alright" Madame Hooch said, "Now let's hit back the floors" James went a lot higher than the others and, as the teacher asked to land, picketed towards the air and landed unnecessarily close to Snape and Lily, making the girl scream in fear.

"No worries" Winked James, I know how to control my stick. Before Lily could answer, however, James had regained his place between Sirius and a round boy who high-fived him. _"That was awesome, James"_ Said the boy.

Snape could not help noticing that most of the girls, and part of the boys, were looking at him admiringly, as the stunt was indeed impressive. He glanced at Lily who, thankfully, did not seem impressed.

He raised an eyebrow and asked "Shall the lesser people try?" Lily chuckled and nodded.


	3. Chapter 3 - First Christmas

**Chapter 3 – First Christmas**

* * *

As the weeks went by, Snape became more and more dissociated from the other Slytherins, and focussed mainly on his homeworks. Lily, it turned out, finally secured herself an invitation to the Slub-Club, and both friends would attend the meetings together, during which they would drink, eat delicacies and listen to Slughorn talk about his connections. He was not like any other Slytherin Snape has met: He did not fancy the dark arts, nor did he call Voldemort "The Dark Lord". He did have his faults, and Snape could easily understand why he was the head of Slytherin : The man was aroused by power, glory and social status. However, he seemed to worship Lily, a muggle-born, which gave him some credit in Snape's eye.

"You know" Said Snape one day as they exited one of the gatherings. "I wouldn't be surprised to find a shrine in your honor in his potions cabinet." Lily pushed him sideways, her face blushing. Slughorn's adoration for the red-headed has soon become a source of pleasantries between the two friends.

"Shut it" she said. ""He says he has never met in all his years of study with as much talent in potion making as myself. You're just jealous because I get higher grades." Her friend looked at her.

"Indeed" He agreed, bending his head forward as a sign of respect. "I always knew you had very strong magic" She smiled.

"You mustn't be so bad yourself, he invited you too, didn't he? I believe he only invites people who very strong talent, or famous parents." They were both thinking of the Malfoy boy and all the children from the Black family.

"Well, my mother was president of the Gobblestone Club in her days…" Snape said, making his friend burst in laugher.

"Oh, yeah that must be it then. I always knew you were lousy at magic."

* * *

The two friends would religiously meet twice every week to study together and catch up on the latest events. If it were up to Snape, they would meet every day, but Lily had a big circle of friends with whom she would spend a lot of time too. During the days she was with them, Snape would go to the library and study alone, avoiding everyone else and, especially, Bellatrix Lestrange, who has taken a very strong interest in him since she has noticed he hung out with a "mud-blood" as she so classily puts it.

As the months went by, people begun to speak more and more about their unusual friendship, as Voldemort was causing chaos outside the school and people had the tendency to associate all the Slytherin students to Deatheaters' children.

"You know" Snape said one day, getting annoyed of all the bad looks they were getting, "Only a few students from our house are actually linked to a Deatheater. They're the loudest thought, so people don't notice all the ones who aren't." He could have added that the ones who did not believe in the dark arts were being bullied, but for some reason, he did not want his friend to know about that.

"You know what Rosmerta told me the other day?" Lily asked, slightly smirking, as they were walking around the lake.

"What?" Asked Snape.

"That you are only speaking to me to gain my trust and offer me to Voldemort once you have enrolled." Snape's face became crimson.

"That is the most absurd accusation I have ever heard" Snape responded. "Why the hell would He want a first-year muggle born as an offering?"

"That's exactly what I said" Lily smiled. "But my point being that Rosie isn't all that bright… same as all these idiots. Don't let them define who you are." Her friend stuck his hands inside his robe's pockets and looked forward, brooding. They walked silently for a while, then, to release the tension, Lily asked:

"What are you doing for Christmas?" Snape shrugged.

"I heard we can stay here. That's what I'll do. The longest I can be away from home, the better. How about you? Are you going back?"

"I don't know." She said. "I mean, my parents said she calmed down and everything, but I think my sister is still very mad at me." As much as Snape wanted to convince Lily to stay with him, he said:

"Then you should go. Make nice with her. If she holds on to her grudge for too long, it will never get fixed."

"Damn it, Sev" Lily whined. "You're supposed to insult her and tell me to stay here! I heard its beautiful around here at Christmas time." Snape smiled.

"You know I would love to insult your sister, don't tempt me… Besides, Slughorn is holding a Christmas party at his office next week, and I'm guessing that it will be worth a while."

* * *

Slughorn's party was on the 17th, that is, the last day before the Hogwarts Express took away those who left the castle for the holidays. As Snape woke up on that day, most of his flatmates were tidying their bags and preparing for the ride back. Snape left his dormitories and walked his way to the frozen lake. He knew Lily was preparing her bags, and as Slughorn's party was only at 16h00, he had a few hours to kill.

He did not mind the cold, and walked absentmindedly toward the same path he usually took accompanied by his friend. It took a while for Snape to notice the footsteps in the snow, for it did not occur to him that any other student would be outside in this cold, even less alone. The young Slytherin quickly identified the owner of these footsteps, and could tell that whoever that person was, he wished to be left alone. Respectful of that unspoken wish, he decided to walk back towards to castle before he was spotted. However, it was too late, and the other student has abruptly turned around and pulled out his wand.

"Are you following me now?" He asked angrily. Snape recognised the young boy from the Black family who was friends with James Potter.

"Oh" Said Sirius, looking at Snape. "It's just you." Snape could tell the boy had cried. Out of reflex, Snape's hand had also reached his wand. He slowly pulled his hands up, showing he was unarmed.

"Who did you think it was?" He asked.

"No one" Responded furiously Sirius. "Aren't you packing up?"

"No" Snape said. "I'm staying here for Christmas, and it's kind of dull to sit around the common room listening to all these happy lads…" He stopped, feeling his voice about to crack. He had no idea why he was being so open with his fellow classmate, nor did he expect this to actually affect him.

"I hear you" Sirius responded. They looked at each other for a moment, and Snape decided that the young Black was genuinely understanding his pain.

"There you are!" Both boys turned around as James Potter shouted from afar. Uncomfortable, Snape took the occasion to walk away. He could vaguely hear the exchange between the boys as Sirius went to meet his friend.

" _What did that dirt want?"_

" _He just asked if I knew what time it was" He heard Sirius lie._

" _Like he has anywhere to be… You put for a game of enchanted snow fight?"_

* * *

Snape found the dormitories empty as he returned to prepare for his Christmas party. Most people were probably enjoying their supper in the great hall, or playing Chess or Gobbleston in the common room. He dressed up as carefully as he could, given his limited clothes, and walked his way toward his usual meeting place, where Lily already was.

"How was the packing?" He asked.

"It was alright" She said. "Is it bad that I can't wait for the vacations to be over already?" Before he could answer, they had arrived at Slughorn's office door, and their jaws dropped at the sight. By some kind of magical enchantment, the room has expended trice its size. A few floating harps were located around the room, playing in tune Christmas carols. Snow was falling from the roof and disappearing before it reached the ground, and to the foot of a marvellous Christmas tree was a big sparkling dancefloor.

The invites have begun to arrive, and were walking around the room, looking around at the decorations and helping themselves at the buffet. A floating tray arrived to their level, carrying two flutes of champagne. Snape picked them up and offered one to his friend.

"Well" He said, "I think you can leave with peace. I doubt Hogwarts' feast will compare to this."

He looked up from the corner of his eyes, and spotted Lucius Malfoy and Narcissa Black sitting at a table and, apparently, commenting on the decorations with a turned-up nose. He was relieved to notice Bellatrix was not around them.

"Oh, I wish Turnip could see this." Lily said. "She wouldn't hate magic if she could see the wonders it can do." Snape doubted it.

"My two little wonders" Said Slughorn, who has spotted them. "Come, come. I was just telling Bathilda Bagshot here how I have come across the brightest little girl this year. Bathilda" He then said to an older witch, "This is the Lily Evans I was talking about." He then went on about Ms. Bagshot's accomplishments. Lily was politely listening as Snape looked around the room. All around, students were conversing with high-placed wizards. His heart skipped a beat at the sight of Bellatrix Black. She seemed to be having a conversation with Bartemius Crouch Jr and his father. Snape knew that Crouch Junior was the son of a high placed minister, and a fervent hater of the dark arts. This though made Snape smile. Bellatrix was completely wasting her time with Crouch senior and his little daddy's boy.

"There you are" Lily said, catching up with him. "Wow, this place is packed of people I have never seen. Do you reckon we are supposed to mingle with them?"

"I suppose it is the point of these meetings." Snape sighed, completely despising all this game of pretence. "Slughorn wishes to help us make connections with the _high placed wizards_ of our society." He waited for Lily to walk toward whichever wizard she wished, knowing that he would use that moment to disappear from this scene that wasn't his.

"Well" She said, walking toward the buffet. "At least we get gourmet food and a great ambiance. Let's try and avoid people, I'm in no mood to kiss ass…" Relieved, the dark-haired boy followed.

The night ended very late, and, unused to alcoholic drinks, both friends left Slughorn's office a little dizzy. Lily was having a harder time finding her balance, and Snape passed her arm around his shoulder to support her as he decided it was best to walk her back to her dormitory.

"You need to tell me where to go now" Said Snape as they reached the spot they would usually meet, which was the half way between both common rooms. Lily blinked her big green eyes, looking around, trying to figure out where she was.

"This way" She said, pointing in a direction. Snape obliged, until he noticed they were walking straight into a bathroom.

"Lil" He said, "That's not the way."

"Yes it is! I need to pee, wait here." She said as she ran inside. Snape laid his back against the wall and waited patiently, his head slightly spinning, but nowhere as much as Lily. For the first time of his life, he had actually enjoyed himself at a social event. Granted, they barely spoke to the well-known wizards, and the unlimited Champagne helped with the nerves, but nevertheless, he went to a party with a gorgeous girl and had a good time.

Snape closed his eyes, soaking in the moment. Hogwarts was indeed the answer. Everything was changing. He heard the door open and jolted.

"Alright, let's go" Lily said, putting her arm back around Snape, and leading her whole body against his.

It took way longer to get to the common room than it should have, even without the few wrong turns, and Snape soon suspected that they have walked around the whole castle before arriving. However, he was not complaining, as Lily kept holding tighter and tighter onto him, and she smelled like roses.

"It's here" She eventually shouted. Snape stopped, surprised, and looked at the portrait she was pointed.

"Lil…" he started patiently.

"That's the way" She giggled loudly, fully aware her friend did not believe her.

"It's the entrance. I just need to remember the password…"

At the same moment, the portrait flew sideways, and a boy got out of it. _Of course,_ thought Snape.

"What's going on here?" Said James Potter. "Lily? You're so loud… dear God, are you DRUNK?" Another boy got out of the portrait hole, and Snape recognised Remus Lupin, one of the boys who always hung out with James, but never said a word. Snape blinked his eyes a few time to try and concentrate.

"Hey" Said Lupin. "You're going to get us into trouble. We're not supposed to be out at this time…" He walked past James, toward Snape and Lily, and offered to take Lily from Snape's arms. The boy did not want to let go, yet, better him than Potter.

"Kay Lil, you're there. I can't get in the common room with you. Will you be alright?" She nodded, her eyes beginning to shut.

"Of course she will be" James said. "Unless you gave her something we should know about?" Snape looked at him without answering.

"Good night" He called to his friend who was being dragged back inside the common room by Lupin, and, as she disappeared from his view, he turned his back to leave. He felt a hand on his shoulder, and James abruptly turned him around to face him.

"I don't know what you deal is" He said, "But if you think you can poison or jinx one of ours just to sneak a peek inside our common room…"

"It's astonishing" Snape laughed, "How big headed and imbecile you Gryffindors can be. Everything is always about you, isn't it? I don't care about your silly common room."

"Good" Responded James. "Because I'll have you know that you did not discover its location. It moves all the time." Snape snorted.

"Okay" He said, definitely not believing him. He could tell James was boiling inside, however, he did not understand why. Because he found where their silly common room was?

"May I leave?" He asked, James wand still pointed at him.

"James" Sirius called from behind. "Come on mate, Lily is fine, Susan made sure she went to bed."

Snape did not break eye connection with James, the interaction having completely sobered him up. For how long they stared at each other, he could not tell. Seconds, minutes, hours? James slowly lowered his want and let Sirius drag him inside.

* * *

Slughorns's party was the most exciting event of Snape's Christmas vacations. The next day, over half the school left to join their families for the holidays, and Snape was left with a rare few who, for some reason, stayed behind. Then again, as he did not enjoy other people's company, he did not mind the slightest.

Being a first year student, he did not have much studying left to do during the holidays, as he would usually finish all his tasks the week they were handed by the teachers. Consequently, Snape shorty begun to invent his own little experimentations, noticing that by altering a few little wand movements and intonations, the jinxes would produce a different result.

Considering that the common room was almost always empty these days, Snape practiced his inventions there, and left only to eat.

There were so little students in the great hall at dinner time that Dumbledore had decided to make one big table instead of four, claiming it was a waste. Snape could tell that Dumbledore mostly wanted all the houses to eat together and, as much as his intentions were good, it was highly unrealistic to expect anyone from Gryffindor Serdaigle or Hufflepuff to sit near him and casually pass the loaf of bread.

Snape usually managed to eat before everyone else in order to avoid the constant staring. However, this time, he had been so absorbed by is spells that he had not noticed the time. He quickly got up and rushed his way toward the great hall before the supper would vanish.

On the bright side, he was so late that most students had already finished eating and left. He felt someone's robe brush to his and glanced to his left. Sirius Black had just arrived.

"Haven't seen you much these last weeks" Sirius smirked.

"Don't pretend you're not avoiding as much people as possible too." Snape responded. As much as he would like to sympathise for the boy who had Bellatrix Black as a cousin, he could not help despising the fact that he was friends with James Potter. Sirius did not respond, and walked his way toward the table.

"You know what I got as a present?" Sirius asked as he sat down. Snape stopped, surprised. He was about to walk past him and sit at the other side completely. Knowing it would be rude, he decided to sit across Sirius, and let him speak.

"For Christmas" Sirius continued. "I got a picture of our family tree. With my face burned off." Snape looked at him.

"They're so mad." Sirius said. "I'm scared to go back home." His eyes sparkled with tears he was keeping in.

"Why are you telling me this?" Snape asked. Sirius shrugged. Both boys ate silently afterwards.

"I got a pair of socks" Snape said after a while. Sirius turned his face toward him.

"I know it's not as symbolic as being disinherited" He said, "But at least yours cared enough to hurt you. Mines just… don't." The young Black looked at him, not knowing what to say.

"Happy Christmas" He said, handing him one of the Chocolate frogs James had sent over.


	4. Chapter 4 - The attack

Thank you all the for the reviews! I am glad you are enjoying the story.

Note : A special thanks to the reviewer who pointed out the mistake in the wording "Legilimency" – the chapter has been updated with the correct spelling.

* * *

Chapter 4 – The attack (updated)

The rest of the holidays, the two boys made a habit of eating their meals after everybody else. Most of the time, they would even sit together. They wouldn't talk much, but it was comforting to have someone know their secret. A few times, Snape's eye caught Albus Dumbledore staring at him with a sly smile.

However, the newfound friendship did not get the chance to blossom for before long the four tables were put back as the students were coming back from their holidays the next day.

On one hand, Snape enjoyed the quiet and comfort of having so little people he despised around the school, but on another, he was far too excited to see his friend again. He even got to the great hall before everybody else, and sat there, eagerly looking through the doors each time someone walked in.

"Exited to see your girlfriend?" Mulciber mocked as he arrived. Snape flushed and sat down, trying his best not to be too obvious.

"How were your holidays?" He asked absentmindedly.

"Glamourous. Some old muggle orphanage has been blasted, didn't you hear?"

"What?" Snape looked away from the great hall and toward Mulciber. " _His_ work?"

"Obviously. The Deatheater's symbol wasn't visible, but I'm willing to bet anything that the ministry simply erased it as quickly as they could. They're trying to make it look like he's backing down or something."

"Were any child hurt?" Snape asked, fearing the answer. Mulciber lifted an eyebrow.

"Are you kidding me? No, he took them to Funland and each got his own candy apple and stuffed animal."

"You think you're so clever" Snape snapped. "These kids did nothing to deserve this."

"You know, I thought you would be a little more on our side, seeing that your drunk Muggle father is a complete looser…"

"WHAT DID YOU SAY?"

"Settle down, settle down" Someone put his hand on his shoulder and pushed him to sit back down. Snape did not even realize he had gotten up, much less taken out his wand. His hand was shaking and he could feel his heartbeat in his throat. He turned to look at the person who interfered. It appeared to be a prefect from Hufflepuff who had seen them fight from afar.

"What are you two fighting about anyway? Who'se parents drowned the most orphans? I'm sure they both did fine."

"Watch out, Bagman" Spat Mulciber, pointing his finger at him. Bagman did not seem impressed at all, nor did he wipe his smirk. Snape no longer cared about them and looked back toward the great hall, his heart still pounding. How did Mulciber know about his father? No one knew. Except… Why would Lily speak to Mulciber? Did everyone know?

Bellatrix Black entered the room, walking proudly. Next to her stood her sister Narcissa, Lucius and Regulus Black, Sirius's brother. They all had a look of despise on their face as they walked toward the Slytherin table, as if they were above everything and everyone else. Bella took a look at the Gryffindor table and brought her finger to her neck, miming a throat being cut.

"Bella come on" Her sister said. The brunette laughed loudly.

"I'm just messing with him." She responded. They had reached their table.

"Bagman" Lucius greeted with a look of disdain.

"Well great" Said Bagman, suddenly not so courageous. "All is settled, all is settled. Your two lads were having a spat that's all" He explained quickly, pointing at Mulciber and Snape and, without another word, walked his way back to his table. Lucius looked at the two, deciding whether or not he cared to ask what the fight was about, and turned around to join his friends.

The room went silent, as Dumbledore had gotten up to do his welcome speech since the great hall had filled up. Snape must have missed Lily getting in the hall.

"Welcome back" Dumbledore said soberly. "As half of you probably already know, and the other half just learned, there has been a tragic event at London's orphanage last night." The little people who were still speaking went shut. Snape could not recall any other moment where the headmaster spoke about the attacks that took place outside these walls and, from the look on everyone's face, neither did the oldest students.

"There are rumors" He continued, "That underage wizards have helped." His face was stern and forbidding. Snape automatically shifted his look toward Bellatrix Black, who had a defying look as she stared right at the Headmaster.

"Now" Said Dumbledore. "I had the most unpleasant conversation with the ministry while they tried to imply that students from my school could be linked to such atrocities." It didn't matter what the Headmaster said, Snape noticed, as his body language was giving a complete different message: _I am watching you._

"Now, the ministry asked me to remind you all that they have taken extraordinary measures, hired and trained numerous Aurors, and that they would not hesitate to send underage wizards to Azkaban. They are very motivated." Again, he looked around the hall with the same forbidding look.

"If my impressions are correct, and none of you are guilty, then you must forgive me for this much undeserved lecture. However!" He added, and his face became cold and severe as he looked at his students - for the first time, Snape understood the reason why people kept saying he was a great and powerful wizard.

"If" he continued, "I have the misfortune of being proven wrong, then, I assure you, you will wish the ministry catches you first." The great hall was completely silent.

"Well" He Dumbledore added, in a whole different tone. "That's enough lecture, as I am sure none of you are guilty. Bon appetite!"

As he sat down, everybody begun to speak at once, commenting the speech. Surprisingly, Bellatrix and her little friends did not say anything. They kept giving each other cunning looks while they ate.

Unwilling to stay much longer around these people, Severus got up and made his way toward his dormitory. He could hear footsteps behind him he chose to ignore.

"Sev!" He heard his friend call after him, and he stopped without turning around.

"What?" He asked coldly as he aloud Lily to catch up with him.

"Are you okay?" He shrugged.

"I will be. Apparently you have been advertising my father's drinking habits around the Castle." His friend looked astonished.

"What are you talking about?"

"Mulciber teased me about it, and seeing as the only person who knows besides me is standing right here…"

"Mulciber?" Lily repeated with disgust. "I wouldn't approach Mulciber with a 10 miles radius shield charm, much less speak to him."

"Right" Severus replied. "Because he's a filthy Slytherin." Lily opened her mouth and closed it back, completely at lost.

"Good night" He snapped and walked past her.

"Sev!" She called after him.

Snape ignored her and walked his way faster, before she could see the tears forming up in his eyes. He knew she didn't hate Mulciber because he was a Slytherin. She hated him because he was a filthy son of a Deatheater who openly worshipped Voldemort. He knew that. But he was very angry with her, as she had revealed his deepest secret, in a world in which it had no place. In a word in which he could not let people know this.

* * *

The next morning, Snape's first class was Defense Against the Dark Arts which, for once, he was not looking forward to attend, as they were mixed up with Gryffindor. He took the longest he could to dress up and eat his breakfast. If people used to throw bad looks towards the Slytherins, it was nothing compared to their behavior now that Dumbledore clearly indicated he suspected some of them to have attacked defenseless orphans. Snape could not bare the looks they were getting.

"They're looking at us as if we all tortured their siblings together" He snapped. Wikes looked at him.

"I know" He said, passing along today's _Daily Prophet._ "But have you read this? It's pretty bad... They used the unforgivable spells on young children and made them do despicable things to each other…" Snape took a look at the article and spit his drink.

"Thankfully there are no pictures" He said, although his imagination was running wild with the descriptions he was reading.

"Yeah" Wikes agreed. "Can you blame the looks we're getting?" He added, in a whisper: "I'm pretty sure the students who were involved are the members of the DTL" Snape raised an eyebrow.

"Do you know who these members are?" He whispered back, deeply wishing to punish them. His moment of excitation vanished as Wikes shook his head in negation.

They finished their meal and walked their way towards the classroom, which was almost full. Snape spotted Lily sitting with Suzan, another girl from Gryffindor, and talking vividly about something without giving him the slightest attention. James Potter and Sirius Black were seating nearby, and seemed to be participating in the conversation.

Snape made his way to his usual seat, next to an empty chair where his friend would usually sit. Something about sitting alone on this day made him feel particularly lonely. He looked back at the _Daily Prophet_ newspaper he was still clutching, and tossed it aside. The door was shut and the silence filled the room as Professor Watson got up from his seat.

"Good morning" Said Watson, "And welcome back. Now, I don't mean to make a mockery of what happened this holiday" He said, "But I believe that, more than ever, every single one of you will take my class seriously." No one laughed.

"Great!" Continued the teacher. "I believe there is no point on going on with my planned course, and you are all clutching a copy of the Daily Prophet under your desk, Potter." He lifted his wand and a copy of the newspaper flew from James's hand to his. He absentmindedly tossed it aside.

"Instead" He continued, "I will answer your questions about this terrible, terrible event. Now go on."

A few students raised their hands, and Watson went on about the three unforgivable spells and what each one of them did. The students from Wizard families already knew the three spells, and asked more detailed information.

"Is it true" Asked James, "That it is possible to resist the Imperius spell?"

"Yes" Said Watson. "A trained wizard can sometimes fight back the spell. Often, it takes years to break out, and the stronger the wizard who cast the spell, the harder it is."

"But the ones who attacked the orphanage were mere students." James commented. "And not the smartest ones." The whole class went silent. Watson's face was livid.

"You heard the Headmaster" He said. "It is an ill-founded accusation that this school will not support."

"Oh come on" James laughed, looking around the class. "Who are we kidding? Did you see the way they all..."

"Ten points from Gryffindor" Professor Watson cut in. "Anything to add?" James crossed his arms and looked straight at the teacher without uttering another word, but as soon as he turned his back, he whispered something to Sirius, and they both turned toward the Slytherins of the classroom.

"Either way" Watson continued. "The victims were young muggles who knew nothing about magic. They didn't stand a chance." He said these last words with so much disgust that James seemed satisfied. Once all the questions have been answered, Watson went on about his usual class planning. Snape caught Lily looking his way a few times, but turn around as soon as he looked back. As the class ended, he quickly picked up his books and left the room. Wasn't there a spell that could make you invisible? He could swear he read about that somewhere…

* * *

During the next few weeks, Snape stubbornly avoided Lily, each time she tried to speak to him, even though a part of him knew deep down that she couldn't be the one who betrayed him.

To keep his mind occupied, he made an obsession of finding where the DTL members would meet. Most importantly, he wanted to know who were members and what they were saying and practicing in these little meetings. The best way to do so, he figured, would be to stalk the one person he was sure was a member.

Snape walked his way to the best seats of the common room one evening and laid on the ground, underneath one seat. He waited patiently as the students slowly walked back in after their meal. Everybody knew that these seats were reserved. He saw a few students walk towards them and quickly leave as they heard a voice.

"So it's getting serious then?" Said Narcissa who walked in the common room and made her way towards Snape's hiding spot. She sat down next to Lucius, who's hand she was holding.

"I would say so" Replied Bellatrix who followed and sat across them. Lucius laughed.

"So Bella is in love then?" He mocked.

"Of course not you silly rag" She cut in. "He's just so… well you guys saw him at the orphanage." Snape's blood froze. _Was she seriously discussing this out in the open?_ Didn't they care at all about being caught?

"I found that he was very nasty" Said Narcissa.

"That's the charm!" smiled the brunette. "Anyhow. How's the recruiting going?" She then asked.

"I don't know, Bella… first years are so young…"

"You heard Him like me! He said the younger the better."

"How can we tell which ones are for real and which are simply spying?" Asked Lucius.

"I'm getting pretty good at Legilimency" Bellatrix replied. "Believe me, I'll know."

 _Snape frowned his eyebrows._ Legilimency _? Why has he not heard about that? He gave himself a mental note to figure out what it was._

"Guys" Said a voice Snape did not recognize. He could not see who it was.

"Stop talking about this here. I could hear you from all across the room. You will get me into trouble for starting the club in the first place…"

"Oh come on, I think you got the highest honor for that…" Snape sensed a touch of jealousy in that last comment. The man laughed.

"Yeah I guess." He agreed. "Still, shut up, and I'll take care of the recruiting, ok? Bella, you can come with seeing as you're the best Legilimens. Now hush please. No more talk about that."

The man left the group, who begun to speak about some boy Bellatrix might have a crush on who was a few years older and had graduated. Snape lost interest, but had to remain hidden until they left their seats, trying his best not to fall asleep in his hiding spot.

When he opened his eyes, the common room was empty, and his left arm and leg were numb. He slid himself out of his hiding spot slowly, making sure no one was around, and made his way towards his dormitory where he looked at the time. 3:05 AM. He pulled out a parchment and a quill and wrote down "Legilimency - legilimen" before letting himself fall on his bed, where he instantly fell asleep.


End file.
